Empowered Boundary Keepers

Created since Jun 22, 2023

🏁 Coaching

Spiritual Coaching

Life Coaching

Personality development

Welcome to the Empowered Boundary Keepers community on Coto! We're here to support each other in setting and maintaining healthy boundaries in our lives and relationships. Share your experiences, seek advice, and find resources to empower yourself in creating a balanced and fulfilling life. Join us in fostering respect, empathy, and personal growth. Together, we can cultivate strong boundaries and authentic connections.

Questions in this community

hina

Asked 251 days ago

Is it really tough as a single woman (separated, divorced, widowed, unmarried) in India? Can you share your experiences, both pleasant or unpleasant? @Zanzanil

Anonymous・2d

we also have to sacrifice some time and understand each other then everything is going good , but in today's generation every one have a Ego

Answer

theintrovertgirl

Asked 248 days ago

How does one balance career aspirations with relationship goals? @Zanzanil

free_bie・0d

For a women both Career and family growth cycle usually clash. when u have to plan ur family and work on strengthening the relationship at the same time u need to put more energy on career path as well...... well said in above suggestion that we need to prioritize which one is imp for us at that particular time... and once u decide, never go in guilt cycle for the de-priortized one..

Answer

theintrovertgirl

Asked 248 days ago

What are the biggest challenges of being in a long distance relationship? @Zanzanil

Zanzanil・3d

communication. if two people are able to work around their distant lives and routines and communicate to eachother in honesty then it helps a long distance relationship survive.

Answer

AshMegha

Asked 245 days ago

Hey @Zanzanil Can you guide me on how can I assert my boundaries of privacy with my in laws. I don't wanna disrespect them but at the same time I also want that I have some space of my own !!

Zanzanil・0d

privacy is generally a foreign concept when it comes to in-laws. depending on the nature of the requirements you need to play sneeky. eg: if you need time in terms of privacy a schedule reference might work. if you need privacy in terms of physical space then you can use reference of possessive terms in gentle ways. sometimes direct sometimes indirect assertion of boundaries.

Answer

AshMegha

Asked 244 days ago

it's Aishwarya here.Lately I've been picking up on some potentially abusive vibes from my live-in partner, and it's really starting to mess with my head and safety. I'm just not sure exactly what qualifies as abuse beyond the obvious physical stuff. Like is it abusive if they constantly put me down or try to control what I do? Or if they blow up over little things and make me walk on eggshells? I don't want to overreact, but I also don't want to be naive about emotional manipulation. How do i identify it? @Zanzanil

Zanzanil・-1d

abuse is when they want you to be okay with something they won't be, if they were the receiver. abuse is when the damage they cause is more than the love they give what you have mentioned is definitely emotional and mental abuse. not being able to see this clearly or giving them benefit of doubt is because of the trauma bonding.

Answer

Kavya_r

Asked 249 days ago

Hi I am 17 and I am in my first relationship. I have only seen love in movies and I am so excited. however my friends say I am expecting too much. how do I be realistic? @Zanzanil

Zanzanil・3d

a realistic approach to any relationship is to know and value your own strengths and weakness. that way no one can sway you by compliments or praising you. when you treat yourself with value and respect, you set a higher bar for others to treat you. and then see, who is willing to go that extra mile. just remember, life is beautiful and worth living, no matter what experience you encountered. it's all just a learning process to value yourself more

Answer

AshMegha

Asked 247 days ago

@Zanzanil Recently started dating and it's been a roller coaster since. Everyone loves my boyfriend as if he's nearly perfect. But I've been spending basically my entire day with him only. And I'm happy when I'm with him. I go to class with him leave with him . In the process I've been feeling too dear hed with my friends. Even my bestfriend who used to share everything with me now doesn't do it. I'm feeling too guilty that I've not been there when she needed me ! What do I do to overcome ??

Zanzanil・3d

YOU JEED TO LEAVE HOM IMMEDIATELY. 1. being together all day will make the relationship dull sooner rather than later. 2. doesn't look like he's giving much time to his friends either. and this will create a massive emotional dependency on you, later feeling like a burden when he blames you for his poor moods. 3. having some separate times in a relationship will help both of you stay socially connected and the times you are seperate will give you some space on reflecting on yourself as well as the relationship.

Answer

theintrovertgirl

Asked 251 days ago

I've always put others first and now I feel lost about my own desires and goals. How can I start prioritizing myself? @Zanzanil

Zanzanil・3d

start small. prioritise yourself for 5 mins. what would you like to do in the 5 mins? and gradually build it up.

Answer

Na_Dia

Asked 248 days ago

I've been feeling a bit lost and lonely since I'm far away from my family and friends. It's tough not having those familiar faces around to lean on. How can I overcome feelings of loneliness when I'm far away from my family and friends? @Zanzanil

Zanzanil・3d

a familiar environment is definitely what we all desire as a safe haven. also being in a new environment is an opportunity to create new familiar environments. explore the people and the places. the family and friends back home are always there to lean on. just a call away. in today's times technology has made it much more easier to stay in touch. whenever you feel lonely, see if there's someone in the new place you can connect with. find ways to connect with the new place and people. I am sure there will be something that you are comfortable with to build new connections

Answer

Na_Dia

Asked 248 days ago

Hey @Zanzanil Balancing the demands of work and home is getting very difficult day by day and sometimes it feels like no matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to get it all done. And that guilt is overwhelming. What are some ways to deal with the guilt of not being able to fulfill all my responsibilities at home and at work?

Zanzanil・3d

1st of all, define achievable expectations from home and work. we as women have a habit of wanting to do it all. we need to accept that we can't do it all. be clear of what is that you can do with ease. once you are clear you can have it discussed with people who can share the remaining responsibilities. it's a tough call, but we got to take it. what are we willing to loose to gain out peace?

Answer

Posts in this community

SwastiGenztherapist

Posted 262 days ago

Girls do you relate? Watch video till end

ishita_graced・14d

Absolutely

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 267 days ago

Personal boundaries are about knowing yourself. knowing who you are how you deserve to be treated.

Zanzanil・3d

not really. it requires clarity. when you have clarity it becomes easy to work with it.

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 273 days ago

we tend to people please and agree to things even it costs us out health. whether mental, emotional or any other form. let's say NO and prioritise our wellness

Tashipatil・-1d

Hey

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 298 days ago

Change is inevitable. Don't accept the blame of changing. Ask yourself if you expanded by the change or did you allow it to reduce you.

KavithaKalappa・12d

Change is inevitable and suffering is optional

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 315 days ago

If people can't meet you half way, the you can always choose to meet them half way. There is no shame in withdrawing when the other person is not equally invested in you. So match their investment if they can't match yours.

Seemachaudhary・6d

If someone doesn't meet you halfway, it's okay to meet them halfway instead. It's not shameful to step back when they're not equally invested. Match their effort if they can't match yours.

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 336 days ago

the conditioning that 'family comes before ourselves' has a major part to contribute to lack of boundaries. because we've just learned to say 'yes' when we want to say 'no'. it starts with the family. and then becomes a habit that spreads out to other relationships as well. prioritising the family is one thing and saying 'yes' when you truly want to say 'no' is a very different thing. do you know the difference?

leo_beautiful_3872・-9d

agree

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 338 days ago

1 key to personal boundaries is *CLARITY*. of what you want, the more clear you are the stronger the boundary.

advsiCalm_Zip・1d

True

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 342 days ago

lack of person boundaries, not always, but usually involves the fear of loosing. loosing the person, the connection, or the feeling of inadequacy. is the relationship is worth it, if you have to fear loosing it? By setting clear boundaries, we can prioritize our emotional well-being and nurture healthier relationships.

Anonymous・6d

Live easy! Consciously

Comment

Zanzanil Patel

Posted 344 days ago

Hello members, how was your festival season? all the social gatherings and adjustments along with the fun. let's share our stories of 1. holding boundaries 2. failed boundaries 3. learned boundaries let this be a journey of growing together.

Anonymous・6d

Living happily in my own world

Comment

pritha2201

Posted 352 days ago

hey beautiful souls , I am a new friend want to say evry onee oncehelooooooooooooo

Zanzanil・8d

hey dear.... a big helloooo to you. please introduce yourself

Comment

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