by DrNikita_DSexologist on Nov 10, 2022
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My mom said she hates looking at me as it reminds her of all the things she had to give up on. She has always been like this but I thought it's because it's her personality. Now that I am 18 I have come to realise that she was very young 16 or so when she got married and it was most likely forced. My dad refuses to speak on this matter. I feel so had for her, though she has spoken to me like this she was always extremely supportive in other things. What should I do?
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329d
・commented 329 days ago
Hi there! Hope you are doing okay. I can understand that the situation must be bad for you :( It’s totally unfair for your mom to blame you as this is in no way your fault. And also, it’s not your responsibility to convince her or make her like you. I feel you must have already tried that and now it would have just gotten exhausting. I feel you would definitely benefit from some social support. Spend time with your friends and find a support group. Talking to people going through the same thing helps. Seeking therapy is also not a bad idea if you are up for it! Take care 🩵
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367d
・commented 367 days ago
How can she hate you as you are not the reason for her problem, rather than a byproduct. She should believe that though she couldn't change her fate, she can change yours. Don't blame your mother or even your father as it was their conditions, who were wrong. But now help them both to get over that guilt together. Help them to invest in you and see you growing and flourishing. One more thing, you can do -Try to know and fulfill some of her unfulfilled desires like hobbies or carrier etc. There is no age barrier to do anything. Be her friend, everything will be alright.
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